Very bad year for bikes :(

November 9, 2009

Yesterday two of my friends were out riding their motorcycles when they hit a deer.  The one in the lead took the brunt of the impact and the one behind didnt get so much damage.  They will ride another day.

A week ago while out riding with a different group, a rider almost got smoshed by a SUV.  The biker was accelerating while in a pack of other riders when the SUV came over on him.  He had to slam on the brakes and swerve right.  He clipped the curve and put his bike sideways.  Somehow he stayed up and made it to a nearby gas station where we checked to see if he and his bike were ok.  He was very shaken up and the bike had minor damage, but still costly.

A couple months ago some jerk off knocked my bike over.  It cost the insurance company almost $3000 to fix it, but there was something good about it.  The mechanics noticed something I didnt.  I had a crack in my frame and my bike had a recall on it.  It cost Suzuki $3000 to get a new frame for my bike.  If I didnt get that done, my bike could of come apart if I came out of a wheelie to hard.

A few months ago a buddy was riding with some other people.  They were all standing up doing wheelies when a car down the way came to an abrupt stop.  The lead person set it down first and my buddy came down second, all too late.  He ran into the back of the other guy’s bike and messed up both their bikes.

Around the same time another friend of mine was out riding and layed his bike down when trying to avoid a critter in the road.  He totalled his bike and aquired some nice road rash.

Shortly before the last incident a friend had his ride run over in a McDonalds parking lot when a suit backed into him.  His bike was already dropped a few times in the past, but the suit wanted to pay for his entire bike. 

May 4th, 2009.  I was sitting at my mom’s house doing what I always do for entertainment, playing video games.  I got a call from my buddy who was seeing his girl friend in Freeport, which is about 35min away.  He said he seen our friend Andy’s bike on the news and that I should go see if he was ok because he wasnt picking his cell up.  I told him it couldnt be Andy’s bike and that we should wait to see, trying to keep both our attitudes positive.  About a hour later it was my friend again, telling me that he had a very bad feeling and that I should go check on him.  Minutes later Andy’s girl friend called me crying hystically because she couldnt reach Andy.  I told her to meet me at the mall, we’d go up and check out his apartment.  We go up there, I’m not following any of the rules of the roads and very lucky we made it without police incedent.  I see that his bike isnt there and my heart drops.  We go up to his apartment and check to see if he is by chance sleeping.  He’s not.  I find an old phone and call “home” on to be answered by a sobbing woman.  I tell her were at Andy’s place looking for him and ask if she knew anything.  She tells me that Andy is dead because a mini van driver was in a hurry and pulled out in front of him.  It was his 26th birthday. 

Just a random thought…

November 9, 2009

I was sitting in my politics class the other day listening to the lecture.  It came up that Mexico currently  will extradite drug criminals to the USA.  It was said that the main reason was that the USA has stricter laws when it comes to drugs.  I dont keep up with all the different countries of the world and their personal drug policies, but I did know that another country is very strict when it comes to drugs. 

China’s official response  to drug use is zero tolerance and in the year 2002 over 60 people were executed for drug crimes. Possession cases receive no less than 7 years imprisonment.  Calling bullshit when it comes to sending drug related criminals to the USA for processing and jail time.  I’m cool with it if it generates more revenue then it is costing.  If it’s costing the tax payers to deal with Mexico’s drug problems, I say “bullshit” again.

Gun control, ewee

November 9, 2009

Fact:  Illinois doesnt allow concealed carry of any fire arms.  State and federal officers can carry concealed.  Criminals can carry concealed, not legally though. 

So where does that leave the average Joe?  It leaves them hoping that officers will be there when needed.  Yea right, that would mean every single person would have to have their own personal officer for protection.  That would happen right about the same time that pigs learned to fly.  Which would be, NEVER.  Seeing that the only people who get the luxury of feeling safe are cops and criminals, wouldnt it be beneficiary to be one of them?  Survival of the fittest, which includes the people who are willing to do anything to maintain their survival.  Poor average Joe, you be screwed.

Of course the argument would be had.  That if no one had guns, no one would be ever shot.  In a perfect delusional world, that would happen, but this is the real world.  After you wake up for that night mare, you would see that if guns were completely outlawed, the number of stabbings would go up.  Either that or violent batteries would escalate.  People in general are violent and will find a way to hurt each other.  We arent New Zealand, so let average Joe carry. 

Fight the man!

Comment on this please

October 28, 2009

Follow this link to what you are supposed to read and comment on.

If that link doesnt work, simply choose “Authority in the classroom” under “Project 04” to your right.

Thanks,

Luke

Late night t.v. commercials

October 26, 2009

Being a night owl, I get the opportunity to watch things late at night into the morning hours.  I’m almost convinced that everything on during these times are directed at men with major issues.  I just walked into my living room and a commercial literally said “A clean colon is key to living longer”.  Really?  I had no clue, I guess I better go out and get some butt douche or colon blow.  Oooo, even better yet I could call the number on the tv and talk with a complete stranger about getting my colon cleaned out ASAP! 

Another commercial that I see very VERY often is the Extenze commercial.  For those of you left out in the dark, it is a “male enhancement”.  It “could” make a guy bigger and “possibly” make his sex life better.  Shit, they even have a female version of it.  They claim that 40-billion tablets have been sold in the USA already.  Way to toss out a really big number to hook the people watching this late at night.  Either one guy is taking 40-billion tablets and hes really huge *wink* and enjoying amazing orgasms with his blow up doll or people are really buying into this shit.  I’ll knock anything, but also dont blame a person to make themselves better, but come on.

They you have one of my favorites.  When it comes on, I have to look up from what ever I’m reading to watch, even for a second.  Girls gone wild!  Really?  Girls doing anything to pay the price for a ten second piece of fame.  When did that start?  Daddy’s little girl going out removing all her clothes in front of a camera and getting very little in return.  I can imagine they have girls lining up to do this for free, so I doubt they get any cash out of it.  True story, I was seeing a girl that told me in a enthusiastically maner how one of her friend’s slept with the whole crew to get on one of the movies.  Wait, not movies, more like a skin flick.  Except it really is the girl next door on vacation at a tropical location  paid, most likely, by their old man.  I love karma, she is THEE bitch.

There’s countless others that play again and again during late night/early morning, but these I see often enough to actually think about them.

ISU Home Coming

October 20, 2009

This past weekend was ISU’s home coming.  If there was a dance, I wasnt aware of it.  But I sure and the hell was aware of the football game.  Perfect time to get together with friends and have a few drinks. 

Saturday rolled around.  We borrowed a grill from a friend.  Another friend brought burgers, buns, and ketchup.  One of the guys brought some cookies and chips.  And I brought brats and buns.  Another friend presented a decently close location to grill out and have a good time.   Everyone brought their own booze, good job guys!  That was all spoiled when one of the resident assistants told us that beer wasnt allowed out side.  It was and I quote “a family oriented apartment complex”.  We said no problem and hide our drinks in cups and left everything in the trunks of our cars.  What a fucking buzz kill this tool was.  There was six of us and we were all of age, plus some.  Whatever, we had better things to keep us occupied.

The charcol I bought had lighter fluid on it, so it was supposed to go up pretty quick.  The only problem is that the bottom holes were clogged up and no air circulation was going on.  After about 30min of trying to get it going it finally started.  Slowly, but surely.  A few waves of a plate later it was a fully flegded grill out.  The guys tossed a football around while the burgers and brats cooked.  Everyone else sat around and bullshited, nothing special.  The burgers and brats finished and everyone ate.  We noticed the tool was out making rounds to check up on us.  After everyone finished eatting we packed up the left overs and got ready to go to the game.  The girl who I’m seeing got a phone call from a restricted number, I told her not to pick it up.  She did.  It was the R.A. calling to tell her that he seen alcohol in our cars and would write her up if we didnt stop drinking.  What the fuck?  Really?  Good thing we were leaving any ways.

We packed up on as much alcohol that we could hold and made our way towards the stadium.  We passed through all the tail gate parties going on.  I couldnt believe the amount of retardly drunk people that were all grouped up outside the stadium.  I’m not a cop or nothing, but I’m pretty damn sure that there was a shit ton of underaged drinking going on.  More power to ya’ if you can do it and get away with it.  I know I did when I was their age.  The other thing I noticed was the amount of trash.  It was everywhere on the ground and pilled up around the trash cans.  I was just glad that I wasnt the one going to have to clean any of it up.  We made it to the stadium and got to the designated gate on our tickets. 

We were actually a little early and the ISU marching band was out on the field.  They finished and the game started.  It was about then that we all realized how bloody cold it was sitting down in the wind.  I also noticed that no one stopped us with our beer in our hands.  It might of been in cups, but no one even thought to ask what was in it.  A girl came around and handed out fake mustaches to help support one of the new coaches.  She said he was some big wig from another school and he was kind of a big deal, I literally laughed at her.  He was some guy that up until that moment didnt exist in my world.  Then this chick was trying to convince me that this guy should be a priority in my life.  After a little while, I couldnt tell if she was trying to convince me or herself.  Sheep… blind sheep, being led around by wolves.  I can almost bet that she was told by someone who was told by someone who actually knew the guy to promote this guy. 

At half time, we decieded to go get a refill on drinks and some blankets.  We trudged all the way back to our cars and filled up.  I snagged a couple blankets and headed back to the stadium.  We passed up a group of rather tipsy girls who were complaining about having to empty their bladders.  They did, shortly after we went by them.  They stood in a line, yes stood, and pissed right out in the middle of public.  God, where do I find some classy girls like that?  On the return in the parking lot off of Main street, I got run into by a drunk guy and in turn ran into a girl.  It was crowded enough that no one fell over.  The girl I ran into however,  before I could say even a word, tried to donkey kick me.   What a bitch, I just kept walking knowing I couldnt win by beating sense into her. 

We got back right before the half time show thingy was over.  We had to talk one of the gate guards into letting us back in because we didnt notice the “not reentry” signs.  I pulled some really big strings and got us back in.  I didnt feel bad lying to her either.  If she wasnt such a big twat in the first place, I wouldnt of had to resort to being sneaky.  When we got back, it was just my girl sitting freezing her ass off.  My other friends had to jet and somehow we didnt run past them at all.  We cuddled up in the blankets, drank our drinks and watched the game.  The game was over at half time, but we stuck around till the fourth quarter.  The cold, the lack of drinks and did I mention the cold?  all got us up and out.  We got back to the apartment complex and we all went our own ways.  At least we beat the after game traffic. 

Over all, a good day.

Reading pictures

October 12, 2009

I went through all of the ads for early childhood development that the Ad Council had up on their site.  I liked the television ones because they used humor to get to the viewer.  The radio ones also used humor, but I’m not a big fan of radio, sorry radio.  After going through all of the Ad Council’s campaign material, I chose to do the outdoor purple rectangle.   Its simple, to the point, and has the information for a person to find out more if they wanted to.  I could of easily chosen any of the internet banners for the same reasons.  Except that everyone goes outdoors every once and a while, but not everyone has a computer or internet access. 

In large white bold letters, the ad screams “Look, a big purple rectangle!“, with an arrow pointing towards it’s edge.  Well duh, I can see that mister obvious, the entire thing is purple.  “Everyday moments can be learning moments with your kids.”, well maybe the sign wasn’t made for me.  I do how ever, know quite a few people with young children that could possibly use the information.  Wait, what was the web site again?  I was going twenty miles over the speed limit while attempting to pass the old lady who couldnt see over her steering wheel.  I’ll just snag it the next time I come this way… if I remember to.  

The ad says “bornlearning.org” with a Ad Council logo in the lower left hand corner and a United Way logo in the lower right hand corner.  I didnt exactly know what the Ad Council or United Way were until I looked them up.  I really didnt need to look either of them up.  From my personal experiences, I know that anything on a huge billboard costs a decent amount of cash.  No Joe Schmoe would toss that much dough at a sign, so the groups that put it up had to be legit.  Ok, so the sign caught my attention enough to read it and remember the web site.  However, I am not the intended reader of this ad.  It is pointed more toward people with young children.  If I did have children, I might check out the site to see if I could further the success of my children.  Good parents always want their children to live a better life then they themselves lived. 

I personally think the ad gets a shiny gold star.  It has a catcher, which happens to be the entire background of purple.  The ad adds some humor by telling who ever is viewing it, to look and see that it is a purple rectangle.  The ad then explains that in the time you took to read it, you could of been teaching your child what the color purple was or what a rectangle looked like.  No worries, the ad isnt going anywhere and you’ll get a second and possibly third chance to not fail.  Just incase a person cant figure out how to teach their children with simple day to day objects, the ad gives you a web site.  A web site that has all the information that a person will need to furthur their children’s early education.

My stroll in the rain this AM

October 12, 2009

I wake up to the constant drone of my phone’s alarm clock just like any other day.  After getting up, the first thing I do is start my computer up.  While waiting for my pc to start up I go into the kitchen to scrounge something up to eat, which is usually toast, a bagel, or cereal.  After I’ve put what I want together for breakfast, I sit down at my computer to say good morning to the world.  Facebook, Weather Channel, and Yahoo are all open within seconds of me sitting down to my computer.  It’s only now that I realize that it sounds like its raining outside.  Sliding back in my computer chair I peek out the blinds to see it coming down.  GREAT, its bloody raining cats and dogs.  Not literally, but you get the point that it sucks.  Immediately I open the page that has the weather channel to get the current weather.  (I know what you’re thinking, you just looked outside, silly.  Well, it could get better or worse and theres no way to tell if its warm or cold out.)  Typing in the area code, 61761, I hit [Enter] only to cringe at the temperature and radar map.  Rain, cold, and not looking to get better any time soon.  Shit…  

I finish eating my bowl of cereal, jump in the shower, and get dressed for the day.  I add my heavy leather jacket to my attire for warmth and rain repellent.  While walking down my stairs to my door I keep a positive thought, that maybe, just maybe, the rain might have paused so that I can walk to class without getting soaked.  I unlock my door and open it to see it coming down even harder than before.  If I dont leave now I will most likely be late for class.  Locking my door behind me, I say “fucking rain” aloud and turn to take my first step into the down pour.  I put my hood from my hoody up over my head and baseball cap and step forward.  Cold rain still manages to peck at my face here and there, even with my hoody and cap on.  I never take the same way to school twice in the same day, just a habit from being in the Coast Guard and never doing something that a person can follow. 

Today I choose to cut across a neighboring aparment’s lawn onto a street that leads me to Linden.  The south side of the street doesnt have a side walk, so I cut across the street onto the side walk on the north side.  Abouth three-quarters down the side walk, I notice something on the sidewalk.  Its an insect for sure, but its plump and white and moving very slowly.  Its a fat little grub!  Looking down, I take extra caution to step over the first grub that I’d seen in years.  While looking down I realized that my pants were already getting soaked on my thy’s and I still had a ways to go to get to campus.  With this realization, my body registers that my legs are getting wet and cold.  Thanks mister grub, now I realize that I’m cold and wet.   Whereas before I was just walking and thinking to myself, ignoring any physical aliment.  Turning onto Linden I check both ways for a break in traffic, none soon. 

So, I continue down Linden towards campus.  I pass over a bridge with a small creek, which is now flowing like a small river.  Thinking to myself, “I wonder if I threw a inner tube in here, could I float down this stream, right out of town and into a bigger river?”.  Then another rain drop hits my face, stinging the thought right out of my mind with it’s bitter coldness.  I check traffic again and cross imediately, pausing in the middle for a car that seemed like it was in a bigger hurry then me.  The car gave off a mist as it went by, nothing that would normally of hit me if I were on the side walk, but I wasnt.  Walking through the car’s mist I finally make it to the other side of the road, challenge one complete.  The only other challenge is making it across Vernon street and I dont like waiting at stop lights to cross. 

A short stride later I’m coming up to the corner of Linden and Vernon, where two girls have taken up residence with their huge umbrellas.  Neither of them notice me and force me to step out onto the street, I think to myself, “thanks twats” as I walk past.  At least I hope it was only to myself, but I have been wrong before.  Peaking on top of a hill on Vernon, I notice a time for me to cross and take it.  Gotta love it when usual challenges are easy to surpass.  Zigzaging my way through the side streets, I finaly reach campus.  My first class is in Stevenson Hall, which just happens to be the closest building for me to walk to.  I take the back door, cause I’m that kind of guy *wink*, and step out of the rain into a heated building.  I take my hood down and take a deep breath.  I made it, cold and wet.

What is your zombie plan?

October 8, 2009

“BRAINS, give me brains!” a person says as they stumble closer to you.  You notice that the person is missing an arm and is reaching towards you with their only arm left.  Blood still dripping from the corners of his mouth and finger nails, the ones that they managed to have left.  The person’s eyes blood-shot and set dead on you ignoring everything else.  Just then your friend jumps down from the second story balcony, swinging a baseball bat like a two-handed sword.  Your friend connects their bat on the top of the person’s head that was missing their arm.  I wouldnt say missing, but, you get the point.  Blood splatters everywhere in the room and the zombie, yes I said zombie, falls limpless to the floor. 

The situation I just described could be real.  You could be the person that went face to face with the zombie.  Now, what if you were in that situation, without a friend and without any plan?  The people in in the situation I made up, had a zombie plan.  They would lure the zombies in and kill them one at a time.  What would you do in the event of an apocalypse where all the dead got back up and tried to eat you?  WHAT what what, you dont have a plan?  Dont be the person who doesnt have one.

Here is a website that shows zombie activities Undead Report.  We all know that everything on the internet is true, right?  So that means those of us who dont have a zombie plan, should get one.  My zombie plan is very simple.  Grab weapons, food, and those I care about(that are still alive) and head north.  I’m pretty sure that zombies dont like the cold, I know I dont.  There is also no way to go strolling through a place without any food(people).  Not that the cold would affect them, but they would end up dying faster because their bodies would burn more energy to stay warm.  Safety in numbers!  Even if the people you have in your group are dumber then a box of rocks, its good to have them.  You never know when you might need to “sacrifice” a person to escape. 

If you dont have a zombie plan, GET ONE!

Dear Tech Support

October 7, 2009

I was going through my other blogs and ran across some rather funny shiznit.  Here’s one of them:

 

Dear Tech Support:  

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6.

I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn’t work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks,
Troubled User…..

_____________________________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application “Yes Dear” to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:..APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support